Showered with love

After putting it off again and again we finally got to enjoy a baby shower. We were honored to have friends and family attend and host the party for Molly. The theme was a traditional English tea seeing as our host family, The Rowleys, are British. Cucumber sandwiches with the crusts cut off and other goodies were served in a casual afternoon of socializing. We had quite a cross-section of attendees from Eric's oldest friend (of 26 years!) to our new friend Shona who we just met this week through our new daughters (they share the same birthday). We are so grateful to everyone who came and to those who sent presents along even if they couldn't be there. Molly will know at every turn how incredibly loved and wanted she is. It has been so fun for us to go through this with our new "family" of other new parents. We are surrounded by incredible parents with years of experience (John & Naomi, Mandy & Ken, Laura & Rupert) and our new inspirations (all of group 115 and now beyond in the wide world of internet blogging and message boards). Now we are almost fully geared up and ready for China.
The next get together will be at our place for the "Meet Molly Party"!

Finally . . . I am a Mommy on Mother's Day

Our little Molly may not be here in my arms to hold this Mother’s Day but I carry her in my heart. I’ve seen her pictures, I’ve learned bits and pieces of her beginnings and she is now mine. Mine to love, nurture and protect for the rest of my days. She will never be alone in this world again. I have been given the most wonderful gift and responsibility of Motherhood; I will cherish it and our daughter always.

I am so grateful on this Mother’s Day obviously for our little girl but also for the women who mothered me: My Mom and paternal Nana. Never did a moment pass that I did not know I was loved. I thank my mom today and lovingly remember my Nanny for loving me so well. They have given me the greatest gift of all; they have taught me how to love. It is this gift that gives me the confidence to take on my role of motherhood.

I can’t think about our little girl today without thinking of her birthmother. I wonder so many things about who she is and where she lives. Does she have other children or is she waiting for a son? How did she find the strength to wrap her little one in the pink cloth and leave her in the doorway of the market? Was it too hard to find the strength and did her husband take her baby from her? These and so many more questions I will never know the answers to. The one answer I do have is that she loved her daughter deeply and will always carry her in her heart.

Wrapped in pink...

Today we received the second half of our referral after it had been translated (they rush out the first part to all us anxious parents so we don't explode). Now we know some more key information about Molly and her past. Most importantly we now know that she was left "at the entrance of Diancheng supply and marketing store. At the time of placement this baby was wrapped by a blanket in pink baby cloth." There was no note or information left with her. No trace at all of the birth parents who left her behind. Other families in our group were happy to learn that their daughters had been left with money (a full day's wages even) or a note with her actual birthdate. While we have faith that June 15th is true it is only an estimate. We know how excruciating it must have been to surrender that tiny girl and we hope that they did so with the knowledge that she would be given a better life, better opportunities and a brighter future. A little information would have been nice but just that we have a healthy baby girl is all the gift we need.
She weighed only 6.6 pounds, which is apparently why they gave her the name Xiaoxiao (little little) There is a nice chart of her development that shows she is on track physically and "very active" as well as being emotionally healthy. She likes to play with adults although she can be afraid of strangers (we fully expect her to cry when we first meet her). She likes a bath so that's good news and she is in schedule with her immunizations. Seeing evidence that the Dianbai orphanage is well-run and clean we have no reason to doubt this as is sometimes the case. All of this information is as of April 2nd.
Now we have a better idea of who she is and what she has gone through and we're one more day closer to meeting her face to face. After saying it for five years now I can promise with all confidence that this will be the last Mother's Day that Marie will ever spend without her daughter by her side. Still, we are looking forward to Mother's Day being a celebration this year instead of a painful milestone and a reminder of how far we have to go. Molly may not be here yet but make no mistake - Marie is a Mom. As such she is entitled to all the rights and privileges of Mother's Day. I guess I'll be doing the dishes.

What's in a name?

The name Molly has been around since before she was born. We just always loved it and it seemed right. But what of a middle name? We've discussed it, decided and then undecided, and finally settled on Mei as a good backup depending on what her Chinese name would be. Molly's Chinese name, assigned by her orphanage, was Bai Xiaoxiao. Bai is the last name assigned to all children in her orphanage - the Dianbai Social Welfare Institute. So that was meaningless and in fact held a painful bit of her past that we had no interest in attaching to her for life. Xiaioxiao however was a name given by her caregivers based on who she is. She arrived to Dianbai at only one day old. Xiao means "little" so she was named "little little" since she was so tiny and still is. Should we keep it? Just do one Xiao? Start over from scratch? But really it was there staring right back at us - Xiaomei. A little bit of China, with what we feel are none of the negative connotations, and a little bit of what we had pictured of her all along. Oh, and it means "little beauty". That sealed the deal. So it's official - Molly Xiaomei Beetner. And admit it - you kind of wish your middle initial was X.

A look into the future

First off: these were made not by us but by our good friend James. Molly's "Uncle James". Apparently he was bored and has quite a talent for photoshop. We find them both hilariously heartwarming and downright creepy. But for anyone, like us, who just can't wait to get this train moving then here is your glimpse into the not-so-distant future of our family. The irony is that these are some of our photos that we sent with our dossier to China for them to use to match us with a daughter. They did pretty well I'd say. Enjoy. Try to not have any nightmares. (I told him he could make quite a killing offering this service to waiting families. Creepy and weird waiting families but still...)

The Moment

Sorry for the rudimentary editing but iMovie is not the sharpest tool in the toolbox. Just wanted to share the actual moment with everyone. It shouldn't take too long to load. I tried to make it small but not look so bad you couldn't tell it was us. Enjoy

Opening

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At long last...

We have a daughter. A beautiful, happy, 11 month old two-toothed daughter. As of March she was 16.5 lbs and was a sound sleeper (YES!) She enjoys music, all sorts of toys and is learning to walk. She is from the Guangdong province. Her Chinese name is Bai Xiao Xiao but we all know her as Molly. That fictional girl from a far away land that we thought might never become real. But when we opened our package and saw her lovely face we knew that fairy tales some times do come true. Oh my God, did I just write that? The gushing Daddy with a melted heart has already taken me over.
Enough of my yammering. Just look at that face! We'll be there soon Molly to bring you home.